A Lovely Little Chat...

Hey, guys!


So, I'm at home in my pyjamas (despite it being 2:41pm) at the laptop aching to write a new blog post. That's the trouble with me. I'm always wanting to write a dazzling new post with absolutely no clue what to write about. I doubt anyone would want to read someone rambling about having no idea what to ramble about, so I guess that this blog is for my eyes only. *Sigh.*



I've recently been thinking about why I should bother dreaming about being internet famous and having millions of YouTube subscribers and thousands of people reading the words that I've written on this old run-down laptop when it's never going to happen. Nobody reads my blog, or they'd comment to reassure me that they're there.

I wish that I could be something in this world. It's so frustrating, knowing that I can't do anything against all the bad people, all the worldwide problems, all the hate and awfulness in this horrible world. I'm just a little kid typing meaningless words on an old computer that'll probably freeze any second. I want to live a life. I want to live a meaningful life. If only I could choose to...

I'm so young that I have hardly any control over this rollercoaster. It's all up to the grown ups. They're the ones who choose which school I go to, which foods I eat, which items I have, which activities I do. If my mum is unhappy with it, I feel bad about doing it. So I stop doing it.

I know that if I carry on living like this, I'll never have a life. I truly do want one, but how will I get one if I can't even make my own decisions? I need to build up my confidence and independence. I need to work harder on becoming me.

From now on (well, at least throughout the rest of 2016) I'm going to try to develop my own character and fix some of my minor flaws. I need to stop crying over spilt milk. I'm the sort of person who would blub about my sisters blanking me, or if I did something wrong that I regret. I need to think more positive. My mind is always set to negative mode. I need to learn to flip the switch and think positive. I need to be the best version of myself.

You may be seeing a lot more of these random chats, but perhaps that's a good thing. Perhaps people like reading these. How should I know? I'm just a useless kid.

xx